Transformation-A Full Course Meal!

I had two super powerful mastermind calls last week-one as student and the other as co-facilitator.  My mentor raised the concept of the “need to feed” that women have after years of lives lived with unmet needs.  We talked about hunger and how insatiable it can feel when we get even the smallest taste-an “amuse bouche” of what we are desiring, what we have been missing.

There were women on this call who were just beginning their journey back into their bodies, a few that have had the appetizer and are headed toward the main course and then there was me…I have been “feeding” my desires for just over two years. I am ready for the “pousee-café”, the after the meal and coffee drink to be sipped slowly, swirled gently and swallowed with a sense of completion.  I realized as I listened to the stories of hunger in each of these women, that I am actually not hungry.  I am feeling full, plump, satiated, seasoned, ripe.  I am entering a time of “digesting”. I am going inward, reflecting, knowing, honoring, incorporating.   I have a sense of being done with an important life stage and a desire to sit back, belly full, and stretch out into that satisfaction that happens at the end of a full course, kick ass meal.  

I am in the afterglow.  It is quiet. It is calm.  It is not how I tend to “do life” and in that moment on that call, I recognize that I have actually been struggling a bit with it.  I have been wondering if there is something wrong, if I am losing my mojo, if my lover and I have become too routine, if, if, if...I have actually been worrying about it!  I am used to the feeling of going for it, the frenetic drive to manifest. I leave that call with a clear awareness of and intention to honor that I am not feeding now, I am digesting and it is totally natural, healthy, and necessary.   I now know just how much I have been desiring it.

I know that a hungry woman is consumed by what she is hungry for.  I also know a well fed woman consume what she is hungry for and is free because of it.”  R. W. Cole

The next day I am co-facilitating our Hot Pink YOUniversity mastermind group call with our Woman On Fire students.  We dive deep into where each woman is at in her own change process, how she is manifesting, what is challenging her and, of course, how she is thinking and feeling about her journey.  I recognize similar stories from the coaching call the day before. I hear how our Hot Pink women struggle, how they so deeply hunger for the life they desire and how they often have energetic “fits and starts”.  Christie has a particularly brilliant moment and offers up the idea of being the kind of boss you would want to have in your job! We talk about needing and being that boss for yourself and your life. I share how we all want for change to be linear and clean and predictable but that, in fact, it is not.  I share that transformation comes in a much more organic way. There is the expanding, vibrating, pushing, bursting energy of the seed as it is first fed in the soil and how the roots burst forth and tunnel outward toward all that is needed to break the surface and grow. I share that in order to truly transform, there will be those high energy times and then there will be the necessary quiet, resting, rejuvenating, digesting times.  Of course, there will also be those “WTF”, I am feeling stuck and in the muck times too. We encourage being wide open to and honoring all the stages of change. I know I have learned just how good, healthy, needed and powerful it is to embrace the times of digesting.

Be a Well Fed Woman!

Take some time to check in and get clear where you are right now in your own journey.  Be mindful of opening and honoring all of it. What assumptions or judgements might you be making about where you are in the transformational journey you are on?  What can you learn and what do you need to let go of? For me, I am welcoming the digestion and will be ready for the soon to come anticipation of the next full course meal I decide to taste!   Bon Apetit!

Ann Murgatroyd-Soe, CEO of Hot Pink YOUniversity., Author of Ignite Your Life:  Live Life with Passion, Purpose and Play

Christie Gause-Bemis